Saturday, April 29, 2017


Happy Mother's Day

May 7, 2017 is Bereaved Mother's Day

International Bereaved Mother's Day, also known as
"International Babylost Mother's Day",
has been observed the first Sunday of May since 2010.

We encourage you to learn more about Bereaved Mother's Day and the campaign behind it here:  CarlyMarieProjectHeal

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May 9, 2017
9:40 AM


Our own Jaymie Maines will be interviewed, along with newly bereaved parents
Joe and Candace (sharing their story about their stillborn son, Arthur),
on a local radio station 97.1 ZHT.
 

http://971zht.iheart.com/onair/frankie-and-jess-47102/

Please listen in and share with our communities that Share Parents of Utah is here to support grieving families all along the Wasatch Front/Central Utah.

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If you were unable to join us at our April 25 meeting, please come on May 10 to our support meeting "Nurturing Self" to write a special note to a mother experiencing the death of their baby - What do you wish someone had said to you at the time of your loss?  Help us help others - we will deliver these notes as we conduct hospital support visits.

In addition, you are invited to make a beautiful charm bracelet of your own to take home.  Each mother will be able to create a bracelet with one charm at No Charge~additional charms may be available first-come, first-served, for a small donation.  We have plenty of bracelets and charms for all you amazing mommy's!

Ideas for Bereaved Mother's Day:  https://www.pinterest.com/pin/258816309808246992/

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May 16, 2017

Please join us at WingNutz in Draper 121 East 12300 South, 

for a very special Paint Nite!

A portion of the proceeds from this event will be donated to Share Parents of Utah.
We want to thank Tiffany Lindstrom for hosting and putting this event together!

We anticipate this event to sell out so reserve your spot TODAY!  Only 35 seats available!

https://www.paintnite.com/events/_1181820




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1977-2017


5.20.2017 Angel Ball
Click here for more info.



Saturday, April 1, 2017

From Small Beginnings

We are Expanding!
 
Share Parents of Utah is currently expanding support to Central Utah, comprising Sanpete, Sevier, Juab, Emery, Carbon, and Millard counties, an additional 19,000 square miles. These hospitals currently have little to no volunteer bereavement support. This is a great opportunity to serve!  Please contact us if you would like to volunteer in these areas.
My Sister's Legacy
By: Sister Jamesine Sister of Jane Marie Lamb OSF, Foundress of Share
I am a blood sister of Sister Jane Marie Lamb, founder of Share. I am amazed at the enormous gift my little sister has given to our world. We were a large family growing up on a farm in Missouri. Our early education was in a small school with one room that held all eight grades together with one person teaching.
Sister Jane Marie knew from an early age that God was calling her to become a religious sister. What she did not know was that she would become a nurse; she thought she might be given housekeeping responsibilities. She has always been a loving and compassionate person, so nursing provided a great opportunity for her to share those gifts in her ministry. She quickly recognized the joy of reaching out to the sick and poor of our world, and she especially liked working with parents and children.
Back in the 70’s, she was approached by some parents telling her she had to do something to help them with their grief after losing their baby. This touched her deeply, and she responded immediately by listening and comforting in her compassionate way. She knew she had to do more.
In 1977, she was transferred to St. John’s Hospital in Spring eld, Illinois to minister in Pastoral Care. The hospital administrator provided an o ice for her with in kind supplies for her to organize the Share support system. She did most of it alone with the help of a couple of friends and some bereaved parents volunteering to assist. At the same time, she began sharing her insights and experience with medical and other professionals who cared for grieving parents, but knew very little or nothing about meeting their needs.
Sister Jane Marie began providing education on perinatal loss and bereavement to hospitals, seminaries, nursing schools and universities in the area. She was not timid in approaching those who could be of help in all aspects involving the death of an infant such as undertakers, teaching them to provide burial with dignity.
Sometime later, Ann Landers published a column about Share's helpful services. The response was so overwhelming that more help was needed and a secretary was employed to help with communications and outreach.
Sister Jane Marie put her whole heartandsoulintoherministry with grieving parents and others. Many of the wonderful, loving services presently available around perinatal losses today were initiated by her. She loved listening to and comforting grieving parents.
As the foundation grew around this country and internationally, the administration and fund raising demands also grew, so that she had little time for direct relating to grieving parents. She knew it was the time to pass this responsibility to another caring, compassionate and capable person.
In December of 2004, she was diagnosed with lung cancer. She lived for two months. During those days, she spent most of her time speaking with family and friends near and far away to tell them good-bye. This was a peaceful time for her with total acceptance that God was calling her home. Members of our religious community have noted; “She showed us how to die.”

-National Share March 2017 Magazine
1977-2017

5.20.2017 Angel Ball

Click here for more info.
Please Join us for our Monthly support meetings!
More information can be found on our website.
 
April 12, 2017
Ways to Put Effort Into Your Healing
w/Melannie & Jacquelene
South Jordan Library
7-8:30 PM

April 25, 2017
Nurturing Self
w/Carma, Melannie & Jaymie
*Special Mother's Day activity/craft
Jordan Valley Hospital
7:30-9 PM

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

March 2017

Share Parents of Utah is excited to announce 
that we are expanding our support and services! 

Beginning April 1, 2017 we will include the 
communities in Sanpete, Sevier, Juab, Emery, Carbon, and Millard counties. 

We are also thrilled to have the INCREDIBLE Stacey Fletcher on board 
to head up and take the lead on this opportunity.

Should you know families in those areas who are interested in our services or would like to volunteer, we are eager to talk with them!  


We have truly enjoyed getting to know and work with Stacey! Her heart is in this work and she is amazing with the families she has supported! We encourage you to get to know her as well. 



Recently I watched my friends bury their sweet baby boy.  As Kieran carried the little casket out of the hearse to the cemetery, my mind raced back to when I watched my husband, Bryan, carry our little casket, with our own little boy.   My son weighed seven pounds and four ounces, but his casket weighed a million pounds.  Bryan could hardly carry such a burden. Tiny caskets are one of the heaviest objects on earth.  No matter how Super strong, or Super spiritual, or Super brave someone thinks they are…tiny caskets are kryptonite and will bring the strongest to their knees and push faces into the earth asking why.

These little caskets weigh so much because they not only hold our children, we are forced to shove so much in the casket around them—heavy things, things that weigh one million pounds.  We tuck in our hopes and dreams for that child—their first steps, first day of school, first date, college, wedding, grandchildren, tears, laughter, disagreements, and fears.  We are forced to pack these gigantic items around our still children, leaving our own hearts shattered in the process.  Parents then have to fight to close these stuffed caskets, leaving one last kiss, one last look that we beat ourselves with when it begins to fade from our human memories.

I remember wrapping my son tightly in a warm blanket and placing a white warm hat on his head.  He was an infant.  How does a parent place an infant in the cold December ground and not worry about him freezing?   My mind knew his spirit wasn’t there, but my heart was worried he would be so cold.  It was haunting.  Tiny caskets force us to think horrible things—things that no parent should even consider.  These thoughts make those little caskets weigh even more—millions of pounds….

When these little caskets are placed into the ground, I wonder why they do not fall through the earth to its core.  Simple dirt should not be able to hold the weight of such a huge object.  Parents have to walk away and feel the pain of part of ourselves ripping away to forever climb into that casket with our children.  We cannot help it.  A little piece of us will always be lost, be shoved into that simple little box with them.  Our weight is added to its total.

Logically, we stand over little caskets, knowing that our child’s spirit has moved on.  We really believe it.  We see their earthly bodies, bodies often riddled with sickness, problems, and injury.  They are in a better place.  We know that we will see them again.  Even parents who have not been taught it, believe it.  We have to.  This belief is what forces the air in and out of our lungs.  Our heads truly believe it, but our hearts—wow!  Our hearts crave for the impossible.  Our arms, our breasts, our fingers ache for another touch, just one more moment, no matter how still our child is in that awful, kryptonite casket.   Burial seems inhumane, a ritual reserved for a cruel culture, an unforgiving world that forces me to put my child in a box in the ground away from me!  Who would ask a parent to do such a thing?

Sadly, many parents understand the weight of these tiny caskets.  They are scattered around the world, weighing the earth down with their heaviness.  Race, religion, location are not a consideration.  No one is exempt.  Power, wealth, medicine, and happiness cannot stop these caskets.  As parents who own these caskets, we belong to a club that we never dreamed existed, until death took our children.  Yet, with these heavy burdens, we are often given…in time…precious gifts as well.

We are gifted the most precious treasure of perspective.  We understand love in a new way.  We understand the blessings of children that many around the world take for granted.  We learn to treasure time in ways that other parents do not.  If we have more children, we are the types that stand over our babies and watch them sleep.  We treasure every eye lash and fingernail and breath.   We may not understand each other’s pain exactly, but we know similar pain.  For those of us forced to load these heavy caskets, each story is unique, each sadness is different.  Yet, we can look into the eyes of other parents who have lost and not say a word.  We know that it is okay to be broken, to be mad, and to be sickened.  Together, we are a powerful force of survival and strength.  We picked ourselves up and forced air into our lungs when we did not think it would be possible.  Together we stand with others like us, and we talk of our children and say words that we would never say to others; we describe our angels and love them no matter their appearance or condition.  To us, they were perfect.

In time, we become superheroes, and we cannot be stopped by caskets, or urns, or even the burden of nothing to show for a tiny life.  We learn to live with grief and heartbreak.  Our mighty hearts reach to others, and we grow in strength as we carry our burdens and our joys and our determination to live for our babies who are no longer in our arms, but who walk as angels by our sides each day.



Please join us at our upcoming Group Support Meetings.  

Our meetings are always held on the SECOND Wednesday at a local public library and the FOURTH Tuesday at Jordan Valley Hospital.


March Meetings

Despite How You Feel There IS Reason For Hope

March 8, 7-8:30 PM
with Tami and Alexis
Herriman Public Library
5380 West Main Street
Herriman, UT 84096

March 28, 7:30-9 PM
with Carma and Jacquelene
Jordan Valley Medical Center
3580 West 9600 South
West Jordan, UT 84088


Share Parents of Utah has been ramping up to participate in the 

Love UT Give UT 

event being held the entire month of March!  

Please consider researching what we plan on doing with the money we raise and supporting our fundraising efforts and visiting our individualized link here.  



This month's quote:

hope
is being able to see
that there is light
despite
all of the darkness.

~desmond tutu


We want to thank all of you who were able to attend our 
3rd Annual Valentine's Gala this past month!

The night was so memorable and we learned so much from 
Dr. Matt Townsend on incorporating the three E's into our lives!

It was a pleasure to see so many of you there and we are so grateful that you supported our silent auction.  We feel so blessed to have so many incredible items donated/purchased on our behalf!  We were able to raise almost $5,000.  This money is so desperately needed as we continue to grow and help so many families when they experience the unthinkable.  

If you would like access to your free photo, please contact us at info@shareparentsofutah.org and we will give you the link to your free downloadable photo(s). 


Share Parents of Utah Executive Board
Secretary-Jen Bowen, Vice President-Jaymie Maines, President-Melannie Green, Secretary-Tami Alvord
 




We also wish to extend our appreciation to all the volunteers who secured donations as well as a heartfelt thank you to Chad and Ashley Ramsey who passed on dinner and manned our 
Silent Auction that evening.
Chad and Ashley Ramsey

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Share Parents of Utah

Third Annual
Valentine's Gala



We look forward to celebrating Valentine's Day a few days early with fellow Share Parents who understand and love one another!

We are so excited to have Dr. Matt Townsend back with us (www.matttownsend.com). 

He will be speaking on the unique relationship experiences that can occur while on our grief journey following the death of our loved one(s).

The Gala is February 9, 2017, 6-9 PM
at Loveland Living Planet Aquarium in Draper, UT.

We will be holding a silent auction with items such as jetBlue Airways tickets, Disneyland tickets, local sports tickets, hotel stays, gift baskets, and much much more!

Everyone who attends the Gala will automatically be entered into a raffle 
to win a fantastic gift basket put together by our amazing sponsors from the efforts of our incredible, hard-working and selfless volunteers!

Ticket sales are closed.

Photographer John Lloyd (www.capturedlightphoto.com) will capture the evening and provide a free, downloadable keepsake photo for you.

**Full Cash Bar available

*This Is A Formal Event*



Taking Care of Your Relationship After the Death of a Child


Written by Lisa Buell on Thursday, January 29, 2009

Valentine’s Day is a day for lovers, a time to celebrate our passion for one another.  But what happens after our child has died?  Our innocence is lost and it takes every ounce of strength to be civil or even interested in what our partners are saying.

What happens when our psychological energy is consumed with the memories of our child and it is taking everything we have just to get through the day? What happens when we can barely look at our spouse because it reminds us of the dream that was our life, a dream that evaporated the moment our child took a last breath?

What we do is follow our own breath, let it take us deep inside ourselves to find the love and gratitude for the history we have shared with our partner.  We take this time to acknowledge that our partners experience the same love we have for our child; many of our memories are theirs as well.

This Valentine’s Day is an opportunity to remember the love we have for our child and the magnificence that our love created.  Know that we have the ability somewhere deep within ourselves to rise above the loss just long enough to create something that comes from our hearts, even when they are broken: a collage of our family, a table decoupage with our pictures, a necklace engraved with our children’s names, a new remote control so our spouse can continue to zone out on the television, a quilt made from our child’s clothes, a rose bush in the garden that is our child’s favorite color.

Or we can wait until it’s Valentine’s Day and buy massive quantities of half-price chocolate and eat until we fall into a sugar coma, sleeping off the hangover as we hope to be more up for Valentine’s Day next year.  We all have choices in this life, I believe in the human spirit and that we are all trying to do our very best… whatever that may look like. So do your best to love yourself and know that the love, passion, and energy you once felt for your partner will begin to flow yet again.

Lisa Buell is a writer, activist, mother of three and parent of two. She works with Children’s Hospice and Palliative Care Coalition, Partnership for Parents www.childrenshospice.org, as a parent advocate bringing a parent’s perspective to the development of palliative care programs and policies. To contact Lisa email her at lisa@childrenshospice.org

Where do we meet?

Second Wednesday of each month at a local public Library. Please check our website for updates and locations.

February: Grief and Your Relationships at South Jordan Library

March: Despite How You Feel There IS Reason For Hope at Herriman Library

April: Ways To Put Effort Into Your Healing at South Jordan Library

Fourth Tuesday of each month at Jordan Valley Hospital, 2nd Floor Classroom, 3580 W. 9000 S.

February: Grief and Your Relationships

March: Despite How You Feel There IS Reason for Hope

April: Nurturing Self with special Mother's Day craft

Please visit the Support Meetings/Workshops tab on our website for full details.

Contact Us




For more information, please visit our consistently updated website: www.shareparentsofutah.org
or call us at 801-272-5355









2016 marks

National Share's

40th Anniversary!



Click HERE to view the January edition of the National Share Magazine.

This month's quote:

"Grief, I've learned, is really just love.
It's all the love you want to give but cannot.
All of that unspent love
gathers up in the corners of your eyes,
the lump in your throat,
and in that hollow part of your chest.
Grief is just love with no place to go."

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

I am his, and he is mine

Valentine's GALA
February 9, 2017
6-9 PM

Our Third Annual Valentines Gala is our next big event.

We will be holding the Gala at the aquarium and are excited to have Dr. Matt Townsend back 
(www.matttownsend.com). He will be speaking on the unique relationship experiences that can occur while healing after the loss of our loved one(s).

The Gala is February 9, 2017 at the Loveland Living Planet Aquarium.

We will be holding a silent auction with items such as Jet Blue Airlines round-trip tickets, Disneyland tickets, hotel stays, gift baskets, and more!

Photographer John Lloyd (www.capturedlightphoto.com) will capture the evening and provide a free, downloadable keepsake photo for you.

Gala tickets are now on sale!
Your meal ticket includes private access to the Aquarium (after public viewing hours).

The price of your meal is the price of your ticket.
The meal options are as follows:


Chicken Modena ($55)
Balsamic-Marinated Breast of Chicken with
Preserved Cherry Compote, Asparagus Risotto and Grilled Asparagus


Grilled Filet Mignon ($75)
Grilled 7 oz. Filet Mignon, Peppercorn Cream Sauce, Yukon Gold White Cheddar Potatoes,
Steamed Asparagus


Grilled Salmon ($60)
Wild Alaskan Salmon, Dill Pistachio Pistou, Snap Peas with Mixed Bell Peppers,
Summer Herb Basmati Rise


Vegan Aloo Gobi Masala ($55)
Crispy Potatoes, Cauliflower, English Peas, Vine Tomatoes, Sautéed with Indian Seasonings,
Served on Rice.


*All dinners are gluten free and include lemonade, salad,
freshly-baked artisan bread basket with sweet butter and dessert bar!

**Full Cash Bar available


Everyone who comes to the Gala will be entered into a raffle for a 
wonderful gift basket!


Please purchase tickets by January 29, 2017 by following this two step process:
1. Send donations via PayPal (donate@shareparentsofutah.org) or Venmo (@Shareparent).
2. Email us (Info@shareparentsofutah.org) with your meal choice (including how you want your filet cooked, if applicable), proof of purchase and an address we can mail your tickets. 

 

We look forward to seeing you there!

*This Is A Formal Event*

http://www.shareparentsofutah.org


We are excited to have Tami Alvord join us as a support meeting facilitator. She will be facilitating the library meetings held on the 2nd Wednesday of every month from 7:00-8:30PM.

Tami's Story:

My name is Tami Alvord and I have been a volunteer with Share since March 2016. I recently had the 10 year anniversary of my son's passing. His name is Conner and he was born on New Year's Day 2005 with a rare genetic disorder that we had no knowledge of until after he was born. He received a liver transplant at 7 weeks old and many other treatments throughout his short life. He passed on December 2006, when he was 23 months old, just a few days before Christmas. 


I knew of Share sometime after my loss and I had met some other moms who had gone through losses.  It felt really good to meet others who were on the same journey I was, to know that I was not alone in this. I moved out of state and that's when I started to attend support meetings; I finally started to make some progress in coping with my loss and dealing with my grief, I learned how to live this new normal, and even to enjoy things again. 

We moved back to Utah and the thought of helping other families who have experienced a loss kept popping in my mind. I looked up Share on Facebook and learned of their mission and the amazing work they do. I signed up to take the volunteer class.  I have met wonderful people who have taught me so much. I'm very grateful to be a part of this admirable organization.


Monday, December 5, 2016

December 2016


As we begin to come to the end of 2016 our hearts are very, very full!

We want to thank everyone who has supported Share Parents of Utah this past year!  
Your volunteer hours, sewing talents, financial support and support you have given by participating in and/or supporting our fundraising efforts are so appreciated!  

We've watched as friendships were kindled, hearts began to mend and hope, healing, light, love and encouragement was reciprocated amongst many of you.
  
As we look back on what we have accomplished this year it makes us look towards the future with excitement and wonder.  

January brought on a whole new SPoU Board!  Fresh faces, ideas and desires to improve an already beautiful and supportive group.  

This past February we held our Second Annual Valentine's Gala.  It was so fun to dress up and have a much-needed night out surrounded by those who understand our pain and the paths we are traveling.  

In March, Jaymie and Melannie were the first to ever attend National Share's training from our group here in Utah.  We feel very fortuanate, because of the support from the local community, that we were able to bring back so much information and empowerment to continue our desire to help others through the immeasurable pain and grief that comes after the death of a child.  

Our Support Meetings and NEW hands-on Workshops led by Dr. Jake Andreason brought in more grieving fathers and siblings than we've ever been able to support before!  We had some great nights with the Mother's Day crafts and impromptu dinner support meetings!  

Our 21st Annual Walk for Remembrance and Hope at the International Peace Gardens was incredible and the success of our 2nd tree at the Annual Festival of Trees was healing and the fact that it brought in over $2,600 for PCMC is just amazing!  

Because of some of the successes and feedback we have gotten from many of you, we will continue to grow many of the seeds we have planted.  

Watch for when we will pick the Workshops with Dr. Andreason back up again.  

Do what you can to attend our Valentine's Gala in February and our Annual Walk in October.  

Even if you feel you have healed from your own loss(es), consider attending a few Support Meetings so you can be of support to others.  We are always on the lookout for supportive men and women who can continue the work that Share Parents of Utah began in 1983.  

2017 commemorates the 40th Anniversary of National Share and we intend on celebrating right along with them.  They have quite a few big things planned for the year and we will make sure to keep you all in the loop.  

For now, no matter your beliefs, political views, social status or TV bingeing desires, we sincerely hope that this month brings peace and hope back into your lives.

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Mark your calendars for the annual
Christmas Box Angel Ceremony
December 6, 2016 at 7 PM
Christmas Box Angel Statue at the Salt Lake City Cemetery
Visit Richard Paul Evans for more information


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*Great Holiday Gift Idea*

Don't miss our 
Third Annual Valentine's Gala
February 9, 2017
at the Loveland Living Planet Aquarium

Tickets available now by emailing us at info@shareparentsofutah.org

Dr. Matt Townsend will be speaking on the unique relationship experiences that can occur while healing after the loss of our loved one(s)
and photographer John Lloyd will capture the evening 
and provide a free, downloadable keepsake photo of you and your companion.

We will be holding a silent auction with items such as Jet Blue Airlines round-trip tickets, Disneyland tickets, hotel stays, gift baskets, amongst others!

*This Is A Formal Event*

Please choose from:

*Vegan Aloo Gobi Masal $55
Crispy Potatoes, Cauliflower, English Peas, Vine Tomatoes, Sautéed with Indian Seasonings, Served on Rice

*Chicken Modena $55
Balsamic-Marinated Breast of Chicken w/ Preserved Cherry Compote, Asparagus Risotto and Grilled Asparagus

*Salmon $60
Wild Alaskan Salmon, Dill Pistachio Pistou, Snap Peas with Mixed Bell Peppers, Summer Herb Basmati Rice

*Filet Mignon $75
Grilled 7 oz. Filet Mignon, Peppercorn Cream Sauce, Yukon Gold White Cheddar Potatoes, Steamed Asparagus

*All dinners are gluten free and include lemonade, salad and freshly-baked artisan bread basket with sweet butter
Full Cash Bar available
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Please join us for our December Support Meetings - Topic is Dealing with Depression

Wednesday, December 14 at Draper Library
7:00-8:30 PM
Tuesday, December 27 at Jordan Valley Hospital
7:30-9:00 PM

Addresses and more information can be found at SPoU.

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December is your last change to order An exclusive piece by "Made by Mary".  
It is a high-quality necklace created in honor of our angel babies.
A portion of sales from this piece will be donated by Made by Mary to Share Parents of Utah. 
Order here.
Plan your holiday gifting NOW!  Makes a memorable gift for Christmas, Valentine's Day, Anniversaries, etc.
                                    
Each piece of jewelry is handcrafted using US-sourced gold filled and sterling silver.  Gold filled is a durable, high-quality alternative to solid gold, and contains 100 times more real gold than gold-plated products.  It won't irritate sensitive skin and, with care, holds up beautifully to daily wear.  Each piece is individually hand-stamped, assembled, polished, and packaged right here in Draper, Utah by Mary and her small team.  Their attention to detail ensures that you'll receive the highest quality product, made with love.

Character Count limits:
*With One Star plus name: 9 characters (right alignment)
*With One Star plus date: 8 characters INCLUDING periods
(right alignment)
*With Two Stars plus name: 6 characters
(right alignment)
*Seven Stars is the maximum (centered)
*Available in Roman Numerals too!
*Only One Side is Stamped*

Necklaces come in your choice of three colors:
14kt gold filled,
14kt rose gold filled,
or sterling silver.
No plating.
17", 18" and 19" long chains with spring clasps
$55

Visit Made by Mary to order today!
****************************************************************************
Ben and Lindsay Douglas are fundraising to place another Cuddle Cot in one of our local area hospitals.  They are accepting monetary donations in addition to selling memorial pins.  More information can be found on their website.  We are also accepting donations towards this cause by hash tagging your donation #CuddleCot.